By: Rabbi Daniel Cohen
In a world where justice and accountability often take center stage, we can easily lose sight of one of the profound forces in human relationships: forgiveness. Forgiveness is a practice that transcends religious divides and speaks directly to the heart of our shared humanity. It is through forgiveness that we find the strength to heal, to grow, and to bridge the divides that separate us.
Forgiveness is not about sweeping wrongdoings under the rug or excusing harmful behavior. In fact, it requires us to confront mistakes head-on, hold people accountable, and then consciously choose to forgive. This journey is vital because it allows for growth, learning, and ultimately, redemption. To forgive is to believe that a person’s potential is greater than their past missteps—it is to hold space for their evolution.
A recent state election provides a real-life example of the power and challenge of forgiveness. During the campaign, a Latino woman running for reelection in Connecticut made a statement about her Jewish opponent that ignited outrage: “We cannot permit a person who is of Jewish origin to represent our community. It’s impossible.” Her remark was immediately condemned, with many labeling her antisemitic. Protests followed, and the atmosphere grew tense as her words seemed to deepen the community divide.
At a rally organized against antisemitism, she issued a classic non-apology: “I’m sorry that you are offended by my remarks.” It was a deflection, an evasion of responsibility.
I attended that rally, and sensing an opportunity to foster understanding and genuine remorse, I approached her for a conversation. For fifteen minutes, we spoke. I explained that while her call for more Latino representation was valid, it did not have to come at the expense of another group. To my surprise, she listened deeply and soon issued an apology, acknowledging the pain she had caused and her own lack of awareness.
This moment raises a crucial question: When do we choose to forgive? How often do we jump to the worst possible conclusion about someone’s motives before truly understanding their actions? Was this candidate antisemitic, or was she simply uninformed? As our conversation revealed, it seemed to be the latter.
Forgiveness is not merely about freeing the person who has wronged us—it is about freeing ourselves. When we cling to anger and resentment, it is we who remain trapped in bitterness. By forgiving, we release ourselves from this burden and create space for healing.
Photo Courtesy: Rabbi Daniel Cohen
Refusing to forgive not only harms us but also holds others hostage to their past mistakes. It defines them by their lowest moments, ignoring their capacity for change. Instead of digging for the dirt in others, we should be mining for the gold—searching for the glimmers of hope and potential that reside in each person. In doing so, we build bridges instead of walls, nurturing compassion and understanding in an increasingly divided world.
This lesson is especially relevant in today’s political landscape. Too often, we allow misunderstandings and mistakes to harden into permanent divides. But our goal should be to foster unity, to build a future where dialogue and collaboration take precedence over animosity. This applies not only to individual relationships but also to our political leaders. Forgiveness and grace can create the conditions for genuine dialogue, allowing for progress rather than stalling in perpetual conflict.
At its core, forgiveness is about embracing the possibility of transformation. It transcends any one religion or ideology. It is not about ignoring the wrongs done but about unlocking the door to healing, growth, and ultimately, a better future. As we reflect on the grace we receive daily, we must extend that same grace to others—allowing them the room to grow beyond their past and into their potential.
Let us not lose sight of forgiveness in our pursuit of justice. In a world quick to divide, may we be equally swift to mend. Let us carry the power of forgiveness in our hearts, knowing that it is the key to both individual and collective healing.
Photo Courtesy: Rabbi Daniel Cohen
About Rabbi Daniel Cohen: Popular motivator, mentor, and inspirational speaker, Rabbi Daniel Cohen’s unique blend of authenticity, humor, wisdom, and insight helps anyone better navigate contemporary society and lead a life of legacy. Rabbi Cohen has served in the rabbinate for over twenty years and is the author of What Will They Say About You When You Are Gone? Creating a Life of Legacy, and his newest book, The Secret of the Light.
Published by: Martin De Juan
